My name is Kyle. I am 10 years old. I am in the fourth grade at a Middle School in south central, Nebraska. I should be in the fifth grade but I got held back in Kindergarten. I have a problem that has a funny name. It is called Aspergers Syndrome. Don't be mad if it sounds like I said a cuss word, because it's not a bad word.

The doctors at Monroe Meyer Genetics in Omaha, Nebraska diagnosed me with Aspergers in 3rd grade. It took a long time to put a name to my symptoms, because there is no way to test your body or blood to find out why I was having trouble.

I had many symptoms since I was born. I could hold my head up the day I was born. I was stronger than I should be for a baby, and my muscles were always stiff. I didn't sleep well. I never crawled. I screamed a lot. I didn't like to be hugged or kissed. I pushed my Mom away. I ate all the time. I had a lot of trouble with allergies. Especially with antibiotics. I got the hives to all of them. I had nightmares, night terrors, seizures, and heart problems. I went to the doctor a lot.

In preschool, I wouldn't sit still when the teacher was reading books and I still don't. I like to walk around. That made the teachers mad. I don't need to sit still to listen. I remember the whole book word for word, even though it looks like I'm not listening.

I hate loud noises, mean teachers, dark lights, and spinning things. It creeps me out when the teachers turn all the lights off for movies and they put the curtains down. Teachers try to make me look at the speaker when the speaker is talking and they even try to hold my head up and look in their eyes. I don't like to make eye contact like that. When someone bumps me in the hall, it feels like they are trying to hurt me and I get mad. This is getting better for me.

I really like dogs and cats. I have a high IQ. I am not stupid. I can lift up my desk when the other kids have to push theirs around. I am good at saying big words and talking to grown-ups. I know all the dinosaurs. When they were born and what period they lived in. I know many musical composers. I can listen to classical music and tell you who wrote the song. I remember dates and facts well. I like to build things. I like computer games a lot.

At home, I am louder. I feel safer. I need my Mom and Dad a lot. I don't like to be alone or sleep alone. I only sleep for a few hours at a time, and than I am awake. That makes my day at school harder. I give my Mom lot's of hugs, and talk to her for hours.

I go to a group called YES. It stands for Youth Encouraging Support. It helps to talk to people who have problems like I do. They are not as shy as I am. They all like to talk. So do I, but only at home. At school people make fun of me for talking a lot. It makes me feel better than them, because I don't make fun of people. Karate classes help my anger problem.

I am in Resource class. I hate it. They make me do stuff I don't want to do, and if I don't do it, I get a quiet room. I don't think I've improved much at school. I am in the 2nd grade level in reading and math.

If I could change school, I would just watch educational channels on TV all day, like PBS, or National Geographic, or Discovery. If I could change the regular world, I'd change all the TV programs to educational or cartoons, because teenage shows that are usually on melt kids brains. But, as you can see, educational TV is better for your brain and it doesn't melt it.

In the future, I want to become a successful paleontologist that gets paid a lot. I'll buy a big house and act like a rich person. I am going to invent something that is a brain mechanism that hypnotizes all the terrorists who are trying to bomb America, to accept peace and act like a calm person.

My best teacher was good because she actually wanted to help me. I can see a difference in all the other teachers. She acted nice. She never yelled at me. She didn't get mad if it took me 5 minutes just to do one math problem. To help a kid like me, you need to know not to push me. I don't like to do the problems I don't know how to do. My getting mad might be because I am stuck or frustrated, and I'm too embarrassed to tell you that I don't know how to do it.

The worst thing about having Aspergers is not having friends. People think you are stupid when you have a disability. The good thing though is you're smarter than the average bear.

Kyle, 10 Years old
February, 2005
Nebraska

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